Fear is remarkably compelling, and for good reason. If you are in imminent danger, your brain’s ability to register fear and send corresponding reactive responses to the rest of your body’s systems will do well to save your life.
However, it’s rare—if ever—that true physical danger is what activates defense systems in the brain. Most often, the fight-flight-freeze responses are triggered because the fear-based ego desperately wants to guard against feelings of inadequacy, failure or potential rejection.
Yet, everything that matters most to you involves vulnerability: relationships, growth, change, connection, consciousness, any and all meaningful engagement and experiences in life…
Avoidance of keeping yourself open in an attempt to remain “safe” is a gross misunderstanding much of the time. Even if in the best-case scenario your defenses seem to protect you from some emotional pain, what was the opportunity cost in not allowing yourself to see what was possible in the experience of being vulnerable?
How often has being defensive or staying within your comfort zone left with you with the powerful feeling of transcendence and fulfillment? How many times has opening your heart, sharing yourself honestly, and taking a risk positively reinforced the value of vulnerability? Is there anything you truly desire that is accessible through your defenses?
Quite frankly dear, if you’re resisting vulnerability—where all the magic happens—remind me what it is you’re wanting…